Label You, Not Me

Labels are a popular topic on social media, especially in places like Tumblr that preach about not letting labels define you (ironically, while tossing them about like candy). Personally, I think it’s fine if you want to refer to yourself as something and label yourself, but not a good idea to let other people do it. Why? Well, that should be obvious. You get situations like what happened to me. And that’s a light example, compared to most of the things I’ve had said about me, both behind my back and to my face.

It’s funny how we can know what someone says about us isn’t true, but it can still bother us. Maybe because such people have the audacity to tell lies in the first place. Really, I don’t know what I expected from someone with that blog URL. That really should’ve make it obvious the person behind that blog is the type to tell lies and make false accusations.

The reason this comes to mind is out of everything I’ve ever been called, why am I treating “nostalgic” like a crisis? Or “blind”? Or “biased”? Or even “hater”? First of all, I am blind anyway. That’s why I wear eyeglasses. I have been called racial slurs before. Kindergartners have outdone that person when it comes to insults and I’m talking about back when I was one.

I’ve mentioned at least once before I like making lists. So, I’m going to do just that. Let’s go down the list of “nostalgic, blind, biased hater” and see how far we get.

Nostalgic

Let’s see. I saw Zootopia back in March and Try Everything is in my playlist. I saw The Jungle Book in April and the very awesome remix of The Bare Necessities is also in said playlist. Other movies I’m looking forward to are Storks and the new Disney Princess movie, Moana. And let’s not forget I enjoyed Inside Out, Big Hero 6, and…oh, yeah. I’m obsessed with Frozen and Frozen Fever. Did I mention those last two are actually hated so much, anyone who likes them is essentially deemed to not have a brain of their own? I’m also planning to watch Disney’s new show, Elena of Avalor, when it’s released. That’ll be the first show I’ve watched regularly on Disney Junior.

Blind

I wear eyeglasses, so physically, I am blind. What am I supposed to do about that? Talk to my genetics. Or my eyeballs. Whichever. Non-physically? You know what? I wish I was blind! Then, I wouldn’t see and be scarred by even half the nonsense I’ve dealt with over my life. Maybe being blind would’ve helped me deal with abuse and bullying better by virtue of not knowing it was happening. They do say ignorance is bliss, after all.

Biased

I’ve already talked about how deeming whoever doesn’t think like you is biased in itself, so I don’t need to delve much into this one. Let me sum it up: they’re called preferences. Just like how I think blue is a nicer color than pink. If we go with this “you only like something better because you grew up with it” logic (and I’ve already explained the fallacy in that regarding myself too!), I should despise blue and adore pink. But I don’t. I like pink, but it’s definitely not my favorite color and I do think blue is nicer. Make it blue!

Hater

I yell. I’m hot-headed. I will never deny that. Hateful, however? Hmm. I have an idea. Go talk to my best friend and ask her how hateful I am. Talk to my boyfriend too. Also, talk to the kids I look after. You can even talk to some of my family members. I do hate some people, obviously, and I hate some things, like how violence exists. I’ve said before I’m a cynic. And yes, this is an interesting choice of an insult. You’d think a hater wouldn’t have loved ones, yet I do. In fact, one of those loved ones is my abuser, who I’ve tried numerous times to reconcile with and the attempts keep falling out. So much for that.

Wouldn’t you know? None of these insults are true. Of course, I knew that, but the person who throws them doesn’t know that about me or anyone else these words have been thrown at. And how could they? It really does stun me how after all the nonsense I’ve dealt with, I can still be shocked people make snap judgements like that. Then again, I do it too, hence why I’ve been trying to teach myself not to do that. It’s harder than it seems, but if I weren’t trying, I wouldn’t write posts like these.

It will never sit well with me someone could tell lies about and falsely accuse me of things with no repercussions, but at the same time, it’s another thing I’m used to. My bullies got away with their actions, my abuser got away with hers, so why wouldn’t someone who tells lies about me on the internet, a place of complete anonymity if one allows, get away with their actions as well?

Plus, there’s the simple fact someone will always hate someone else and have trash to say. There’s nothing that can ever be done about that.

City Girl On A Farm

Yesterday, I took a trip with a friend of mine and her family to a farm. I’ve been to the countryside before, as I have a few relatives who live out there, but I’d never been to a farm until then. My only exposure to farms had been television and I always figured they were unrealistic. It is TV, after all.

I had a great time. I enjoyed seeing all the animals, took several pictures, and even got a video of a rooster crowing. In fact, roosters were crowing the whole time we were there, so that destroys the myth they only crow in the morning. I’m guessing Hollywood invented that.

However, I can’t say I’d be thrilled to go again. I’m glad I could go, and was able to spend time with my friend and her family, but if I somehow ever decide I want to move to the countryside, it will never be out of a desire to be a farmer.

First and foremost, practically the whole farm was filthy. I know that seems like a big “duh”, but keep in mind although I’ve moved multiple times in my life, I have always lived in cities. Small ones, but cities nonetheless. Yes, I know cities are dirty too, but this was much dirtier than I’m used to. There were flies everywhere, even on some of the animals (the farm dog had flies hanging around on his ears!), and the children and I had to continuously be very careful of where we stepped to avoid stepping in animal waste in the large areas. I’m not insensitive, so I realize that’s just part of life for the people who live on that farm, but for me, someone who has not grown up that way, that’s disgusting and nowhere near normal. I have to admit if I’d been told that beforehand, I would’ve backed out of going because if I so much as knew about a place as filthy as that, I’d avoid it like a plague. Even some of the furniture they have, like a fridge, was dirty.

My friend tried to console me by reminding me that humans also have waste and, when I said flies are disease-ridden, have diseases too. That’s true, yes, but that did not help me feel better. Humans, at least as I’ve been taught, do that business in the privacy of a bathroom with the door locked! When humans get sick, we stay in bed until we’re well again or, if it’s severe, seek medical attention. In the case that we can’t stay home until we’re well again, we take over-the-counter medicine and carry tissues with us to avoid spreading our illness to other people. Yes, some people aren’t that considerate, but most people I’ve met are. I don’t think the same can be said for flies, and frankly, I don’t like most insects anyway. Flies, in particular, disgust me.

The bottom line is while I admire the work they do, that’s not a lifestyle I could live. No, I wasn’t expecting all the animals to be cute and cuddly, but I certainly wasn’t expecting flies to be swarming either. We couldn’t even eat without flies around. I wasn’t expecting a farm to be as pristine as a hospital, but I wasn’t expecting that level of filth either. My friend teased me a bit about being a complete city girl and I suppose I can’t say she’s wrong. I’ve grown up across cities, so what else could I be? However, considering other nature trips I’ve enjoyed, like hiking, I’d say it’s less of a “city girl” thing and more of a “this is too much filth for me” thing.