About two years ago, I got into drawing. I hate to say it, but I started for a really bad reason. I wanted to eventually draw fan art of my favorite show. Stupidly, I wanted to learn a particular language for the same reason. While it’s not entirely meaningless because I now genuinely do want to learn, I’m still kind of hooked on drawing fan art.
The thing is I haven’t really done anything for months. Last year, I had an art class, but it bored the heck out of me. Not because it wasn’t about fan art or anything like that. I just couldn’t seem to get anything out of it and I mostly remember movies. Specifically Spirited Away and Howl’s Moving Castle.
I don’t like to draw in school because it’s too noisy and I don’t like to draw at home because I don’t want anybody seeing. And by the time I can be alone, it’s late and I’m tired. I occasionally do stuff online, but not from scratch.
On top of that, it’s not just fan art I’m hooked on anymore. Now, I find myself wishing I could draw so I could send pictures of my friends for them at birthdays or Christmas or even just make a silly comic of us all. But it takes practice – years of it – to get to any decent level. Notice I said “decent”. I could start drawing again tomorrow, continue everyday until I’m twenty-five and still be drawing stuff that looks worse than a toddler’s scribbles. Yeah, that’s discouraging.
Still, I want to do it, but I’m going to need a better reason than a TV show. I have a sketchbook I haven’t touched since the day I bought it because I don’t want it filled with ugly pictures. I don’t care about being professional, but I want to be a good hobbyist at the very least.
So I will get back into drawing. Perhaps over spring break or perhaps during my gap year. But maybe I’ll do flowers instead of characters.
Kaye's Days 
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